April's Literary Pursuits on the F Train

Here are another ten cliff-hangers being consumed this month by literary enthusiasts on the F train during the commute between Manhattan and Brooklyn. Enjoy the sneak peek!

2666
The novel is divided into five parts and begins with the adventures and love affairs of a small group of scholars dedicated to the work of Benno von Archimboldi, a reclusive German novelist. They trace the writer to the Mexican border town of Santa Teresa, but there the trail runs dry, and it isn't until the final section that readers actually learn about Benno. (Publishers Weekly)




American Buffalo
"The finest American playwright of his generation" (Sunday Times) A junk shop. Three small-time crooks plot to carry out the midnight robbery of a coin collection. In the hours leading up to the heist, friendship becomes the victim in a conflict between loyalty and business."This play is a parable about the US - not in the journalistic way but quietly, stealthily, with all the rich interior organisation of a true work of art" (Observer)



An Arsonist's Guide to Writers' Homes in New England
The delightfully dark story of Sam Pulsifer, the accidental arsonist and murderer narrator who leads readers through a multilayered, flame-filled adventure about literature, lies, love and life. The blurred boundaries between fact and fiction, story and reality become the landscape for amusing and provocative adventures that begin when, at age 18, Sam accidentally torches the Emily Dickinson Homestead, killing two people. (Publishers Weekly)



The Book of Night Women
Powerful and eloquently narrated in a lilting Jamaican patois that at once underscores and eerily conflicts with the disturbing images of violence and degradation. Though the novel is filled with familiar figures -- dissolute masters, jealous mistresses, house and field slaves -- James never lets them devolve into cliches or ciphers. (Bookmarks Magazine)




The Color of Water
The need to clarify his racial identity prompted the author to penetrate his veiled and troubled family history. Ruth McBride Jordan's grim upbringing in an abusive environment is left behind when she moves to Harlem, marries a black man, converts to Christianity, and co-founds a Baptist congregation with her husband. The courage and tenacity shown by this twice-widowed mother who manages to raise 12 children are remarkable. (Library Journal)



Foreskin's Lament: A Memoir
Auslander, a magazine writer, describes his Orthodox Jewish upbringing as theological abuse in this sardonic, twitchy memoir that waits for the other shoe to drop from on high. Flitting haphazardly between expectant-father neuroses and childhood neuroses Auslander labors mightily to channel Philip Roth with cutting, comically anxious spiels lamenting his off-kilter family and temptations of all things non-Kosher. (Publishers Weekly)




Hammer of God
As an asteroid named "Kali" hurtles toward earth on a collision course that spells the end to life on the planet. Meanwhile, a lone spaceship armed with a weapon to alter the asteroid's path attempts to carry out its perilous mission--unaware that others are simultaneously working for earth's destruction. (Library Journal)





Leviathan
This is one of the few books in western thought that cannot receive enough praise. It is all at the same time a compilation of classical and medieval thought, a biting commentary and critique of 17th century Europe (mostly England), an exploration of philosophy as science, and the first truly modern work of political philosophy. (C.N. Gallimore)




Mystery and Manners: Occasional Prose
"[Flannery O'Connor] was not just the best 'woman writer' of [her] time and place; she expressed something secret about America, called 'the South,' with that transcendent gift for expressing the real spirit of a culture that is conveyed by those writers . . . who become nothing but what they see. Completeness is one word for it: relentlessness [and] unsparingness would be others." (New York Times)




The Shock Doctrine: The Rise of Disaster Capitalism
Naomi Klein advances a truly unnerving argument: historically, while people were reeling from natural disasters, wars and economic upheavals, savvy politicians and industry leaders nefariously implemented policies that would never have passed during less muddled times. This reprehensible game of bait-and-switch isn't just some relic from the bad old days. It's alive and well in contemporary society. (Amazon)

Literary Pursuits on the F Train: Part Deux

My last post featured 10 books that have recently engrossed F train readers during their morning commutes on the Manhattan-bound subway out of Brooklyn. I was considering making this a monthly feature (and perhaps I may still), but a wait of three more weeks proved too long as I was unable to resist the temptation of discovering new works of literature, more-or-less under my nose.

As subtly as possible to avoid the inevitable dirty looks from the eavesdropping-phobic, I've squinted and strained this week to read the distant titles of novels that my fellow commuters have brought along for their rides. Many are the unsurprising, current New York Times Bestsellers, while others are unexpected and compelling finds that may just inspire additions to my 2010 booklist.

I spy with my eye ... something old, something new, something borrowed from the Brooklyn Public Library, something blue ...

Boomsday
It's the end of the world as we know it, especially if bloggers are setting the national agenda. In his latest novel, Buckley imagines a not-so-distant future when America teeters on the brink of economic disaster. Buckley's heroine is "a morally superior 29-year-old PR chick" who blogs at night about the impending Boomsday budget crisis. And her name? Cassandra. "Cassandra is a metaphor for catastrophe prediction. It's what I do." (Publishers Weekly)



The Conscience of a Liberal
In this New York Times bestseller, Paul Krugman, today's most widely read economist, examines the past eighty years of American history. Seeking to understand both what happened to middle-class America and what it will take to achieve a "new New Deal," Krugman has created his finest book to date, a "stimulating manifesto" offering "a compelling historical defense of liberalism and a clarion call for Americans to retake control of their economic destiny" (Publishers Weekly).



Digital Fortress
On page 1, the protagonist, lately dismissed from The National Security Agency (NSA), drops dead of a supposed heart attack. Though dead, he enjoys a dramaturgical afterlife in the form of his computer program. Digital Fortress creates unbreakable codes, which could render useless NSA's code-cracking supercomputer called TRANSLTR, but the deceased programmer slyly embossed a decryption key on a ring he wore. Pursuit of this ring is the engine of the plot. (Gilbert Taylor)



The Fountainhead
On the surface, The Fountainhead is a story of one man, Howard Roark, and his struggles as an architect in the face of a successful rival, Peter Keating, and a newspaper columnist, Ellsworth Toohey. But the book addresses a number of universal themes: the strength of the individual, the tug between good and evil, and the threat of fascism. The confrontation of those themes, along with the amazing stroke of Rand's writing, combine to give this book its enduring influence. (Amazon)



Four to Score
Half-Hungarian, half-Italian and all-Jersey, Trenton's best-known bounty hunter, Stephanie Plum, is a raucous delight. When Maxine Nowicki, charged with stealing her boyfriend's car, skips her court appearance, she's fair game to be hauled in. Before the case is over, Stephanie will invade an Atlantic City casino with her intrepid allies: Grandma Mazur, Lula, and Sally, a seven-foot transvestite rock singer. Although Stephanie is the bounty hunter, she's the only one who isn't armed. (Publishers Weekly)



The Giant's House
A platonic and achingly poignant love affair between a young man who suffers from gigantism and a librarian who is 14 years his senior is the focus of this remarkable debut novel. Narrator Peggy Cort, spinster librarian, first becomes aware of James Sweatt when he comes into the library with his grade-school class, already 6'2" at age 11. Peggy finds herself drawn to the gentle, lonely young man, because he fills a void in her own life and because of James's loving but eccentric family. (Publishers Weekly)



The Savage Detectives
The major work from the great Chilean-born novelist Bolaño. In early 1970s Mexico City, young poets Arturo Belano and Ulises Lima start a small, erratically militant literary movement, the Visceral Realists, named for another, semimythical group started in the 1920s by the nearly forgotten poet Cesárea Tinajero. Bolaño fashions an engrossing lost world of youth and utopian ambition, as particular and vivid as it is sad and uncontainable. (Publishers Weekly)



A Thousand Splendid Suns
Hosseini's riveting story is an in-depth exploration of Afghan society in the three decades of anti-Soviet jihad, civil war, and Taliban cruelty. He impels us to empathize with and admire those most victimized by Afghan history and culture—women. Mariam, a 15-year-old bastard, is married off to 40-year-old Rasheed, who abuses her brutally, especially after she has several miscarriages. At 60, Rasheed takes in 14-year-old Laila, and the two wives form a strange alliance. (Publishers Weekly)



The Wasp Factory
Few novelists have ever burst onto the literary scene with as much controversy as Iain Banks in 1984. The Wasp Factory is distinguished by an authentically felt and deftly written first-person style, delicious dark humor, a sense of the surreal, and a serious examination of the psyche of a childhood psychopath. Most readers will find that they sympathize with Frank, despite his three murders. It's a classic of contemporary horror. (Fiona Webster)




The Year of Living Biblically
What would it require for a person to live all the commandments of the Bible for an entire year? That is the question that animates this hilarious, thought-provoking memoir. Jacobs didn't just keep the Bible's better-known moral laws, but also the obscure and unfathomable ones. Throughout his journey, he is a generous and thoughtful participant, lacing his story with funny cultural commentary as well as nuanced insights into the impossible task of biblical literalism. (Publishers Weekly)

A Commuter's Library: Literary Pursuits on the F Train

The Manhattan-bound F train out of Brooklyn has been sucking lately. There's more delays than ever with severe overcrowding during rush hour, and best of all, if the proposed MTA fare hikes go through, we B'klyners - and all other NYC subway riders - may soon have to pay 25% more for our unlimited Metrocards, raising the monthly bill from $81 to a sickening $103.

Mother $%&#s!

But we F train commuters are trying to make the best of it. Those of us lucky enough to get seats (and those able to stand and balance a book without impaling other riders), often engage in a little literary escapism to make it through the daily drudgery. In addition to the staples of NYC transit: The New Yorker, The Bible, and the Twilight series (in that order), F train commuters indulge in a veritable cornucopia of literary pursuits, from the trashy to the classy.

Some of last week's riveting reads:


The Billionaire in Penthouse B
A rich, powerful loner, Gage fit the description of the man who may have information about the mysterious demise of Jacinda Endicott's sister. Which was why Jacinda had abandoned her old life and taken a job at Gage's penthouse as his live-in maid. By day, she snooped for clues about her employer; by night, she fought her fatal attraction to the sexy, secretive billionaire. Her heart told her Gage was innocent; her head warned her otherwise. Which would she listen to? (product description)



Brief Interviews with Hideous Men
Some of the 23 stories in Wallace's bold, uneven, bitterly satirical second collection seem bound for best-of-the-year anthologies. In the "interviews," that make up the title story, one man after another, speaking to a woman whose voice we never hear, reveals the pathetic creepiness of his romantic conquests and fantasies. These stories, at their best, show an erotic savagery and intellectual depth that will confound, fascinate and disturb the most unsuspecting reader as well as devoted fans. (Publishers Weekly)



The Graveyard Book
Neil Gaiman has created a charming allegory of childhood. Although the book opens with a scary scene as a family is stabbed to death, the story quickly moves into more child-friendly storytelling. The sole survivor of the attack, an 18-month-old baby, escapes his crib and toddles to a nearby graveyard. Quickly recognizing that the baby is orphaned, the graveyard's ghostly residents adopt him, name him Nobody, and allow him to live in their tomb. (Heidi Broadhead)



How Soccer Explains the World
Foer, a New Republic editor, scores a game-winning goal with this analysis of the interchange between soccer and the new global economy. The subtitle is a bit misleading, though: he doesn't really use soccer to develop a theory; instead, he focuses on how examining soccer in different countries allows us to understand how international forces affect politics and life around the globe. The book is full of colorful reporting, strong characters and insightful analysis. (Publishers Weekly)



The Omnivore's Dilemma
Michael Pollan writes about how our food is grown -- what it is, in fact, that we are eating. The first section discusses industrial farming; the second, organic food, both as big business and on a small farm; and the third, what it is like to hunt and gather food for oneself. Each section culminates in a meal - a cheeseburger from McDonald's; roast chicken and vegetables from Whole Foods; grilled chicken and corn from a sustainable farm; and, finally, a meal foraged from the wild. (Washington Post)



Petropolis
This debut novel traces Russian-Jewish Sasha Goldberg's screwball coming-of-age and search for her long-ago disappeared father. After Sasha is accepted into a local, cash-strapped art school in the gloomy Siberian town of Asbestos, she becomes pregnant and has a daughter, whom she is forced to leave behind to attend an art school in Moscow. Sasha begins scheming her way to America and soon is on a plane to Phoenix, Ariz., as a 17-year-old mail-order bride. (Publishers Weekly)



The Pitchfork 500
Named the "best site for music criticism on the web" by The New York Times Magazine, Pitchforkmedia.com has become the leading independent resource for music journalism, the place people turn to find out what's happening in new music. In The Pitchfork 500: Our Guide to the Greatest Songs from Punk to the Present, Pitchfork offers up their take on the 500 best songs of the past three decades.




The Secret Supper
Set in the late 15th century, the book revolves around a papal inquisitor's investigation into Leonardo da Vinci's alleged heresies. After receiving a series of cryptic messages from "the Soothsayer," who warns that "art can be employed as a weapon," the Secretariat of Keys of the Papal States dispatches Father Agostino Leyre on a twofold mission to Milan: identify the Soothsayer and discover what, if any, messages da Vinci is hiding in the painting. (Publishers Weekly)



Watchmen
The story concerns a group called the Crimebusters and a plot to kill and discredit them. Moore's characterization is as sophisticated as any novel's as he investigates issues of power and control, propelling the comic genre forward and making "adult" comics a reality. The intelligent social and political commentary, the structure of the story itself, the fine pace of the writing, and its humanity mean that Watchmen keeps its crown as the best the genre has yet produced. (Mark Thwaite)




The Wordy Shipmates
Essayist and public radio regular Vowell revisits America's Puritan roots in this witty exploration of the ways in which our country's present predicaments are inextricably tied to its past. In a style less colloquial than her previous books, Vowell traces the 1630 journey of several key English colonists and members of the Massachusetts Bay Colony. Gracefully interspersing her history lesson with personal anecdotes, Vowell offers reflections that are both amusing and tender. (Publishers Weekly)

Twilight: The Mammoth Book Review

I apologize in advance for the size of this Twilight review, which can only be described as pre-historically mammoth. Stock up on food and water, and enjoy.


It took me a while to get through Twilight, the best-selling YA novel by Stephenie Meyer; a full two weeks, much longer than expected. Despite its 500 pages, the word count is a moderate 118,000, much shorter than any of the last four Harry Potters, which I happily devoured in 24 hour periods. I took breaks during Twilight to read three other YA books: two mysteries by Christopher Pike and the charming The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle by Avi, before marathoning the last 200 pages to get it over with.

Prior to succumbing to the Twilight book-fever last fall, I heard a lot about the series, and much of the word-of-mouth wasn't promising. I saw the movie in November at the urging of a good friend (review is here), and while it was better than expected, I was still reluctant to suffer bad writing without at least getting to bitch about it. As I am currently between book clubs, bitching via blog is my only outlet.

It's fair to say that I approached the text with a certain bias from tons of pre-exposure. At the very least, having seen the faithfully adapted film meant I already knew the story and I had a good idea of where the story would end up by book four (creepy vampire birth). The questions I wanted to answer for myself were:

• Is the writing better or worse than the abysmal Eragon?
• Just how disturbing is the Bella-Edward relationship?
• Are the characters really Mary Sues?
• What lessons can be learned by YA writers looking to be the next big thing?

From page one, I was willing to like it, I just wasn't expecting to.

Quickie Summary

In Twilight, ordinary Bella Swan moves from sunny Phoenix, Arizona to gloomy Forks, Washington, where she meets Edward Cullen, an uber hot guy at her high school who happens to be a vampire. When Bella discovers Edward's secret, the two begin an angsty and obsessive courtship, interrupted only when new baddie vampires come to town with a thirst for humans, and Bella in particular.

The Style

I am happy to say that Twilight was not the worst book I've ever read. That honor still belongs to the painfully derivative Eragon by Christopher Paolini, a sixteen year old who got published by his parents and somehow became a best-selling sensation, despite his awful prose and blatant thievery of Lord of the Rings, Star Wars, and other high-fantasy classics. Only my desire to rip Eragon apart via book club review could keep me from literally ripping the book to shreds. Instead, I settled for throwing it across the room and screaming my disgust on several occasions.

Twilight, fortunately, did not elicit such a strong reaction. As a whole, the novel was mediocre, falling somewhere in a long line of disappointments including The Nanny Diaries, A Wizard, A Witch, and Two Girls From Jersey, and a dozen other books that I read and then forgot.

The greatest weakness of Twilight's prose was not so much the pedestrian style but the overwrought details. Three quarters of the book read like entries in Bella's private journal, describing outfits she wears, food she eats, and her entire school day from first period through gym - over and over and over. There is very little plot to be found other than Bella and Edward's constant mooning and repetitive "we should but we shouldn't" angst until around page 380 when the vampires finally play baseball and a "real" antagonist appears.

A good editor could have done a lot to tighten both the plot and the language. Meyer relies too heavily on adjectives and adverbs, and many of her melodramatic descriptors feel so out of place in a contemporary YA novel that I actually had to take regular breaks to roll my eyes before I could continue reading. Examples include Edward's alabaster skin, his scintillating arms, and his sculpted, incandescent chest. Meyer doesn't only introduce the novel's vampires as being extraordinarily attractive, but actually reminds the readers of their extreme hotness an average of once per page. Edward is a magnificent Adonis and all lesser immortals bow before him.

The thesaurus can be a great friend, but if the friendship is abusive, there can be dire consequences for all.

The Characters

I am probably one of the few Twilight critics that will admit to being intrigued by Meyer's twist on the vampire mythos. I have no problem with the fact that Meyer's "vegetarian" vampires are immune to sunlight, holy water, and garlic, and that they love baseball and sparkle in the daylight. Many critics have been particularly negative about the "sparkly" thing, finding the idea laughable, but I would argue that it works in Meyer's world. Because of their skin condition, vampires can't blend in during the day, hence only coming out at night and living in mostly sunless towns. Sparkling also furthers the Twilight dichotomy of beautiful = deadly.

Isabella Swan, Twilight's heroine, is supposed to be identifiable to every young woman who has ever felt like a fish out of water: insecure, lonely, and failing to connect with her peers. In other words, Bella = average high school girl. The problem is that Bella is such a generic stand-in for the author/reader that she fails to have a personality of her own. She does well in school, particularly biology, but this braininess is off-set by her total lack of coordination, and that's about all the reader knows. It's hard to identify any of Bella's interests, aside from Edward. Does she have dreams or ambitions? I read the book less than a week ago and honestly can't remember anything she actually likes to do, other than snogging vampires.

By the end of the book, Bella is so desperate to shuck the mortal coil and just-become-a-vampire-already, that it's suggested that she has absolutely nothing to live for aside from Edward, which is not the case with most teenage girls, even at their most depressed/obsessed.

Without non-vampire interests or a desire to live, Bella suffers from a lack of relatability, and this problem is compounded by the fact that she, as a character, fails to relate in general. Her estrangement from her parents is fully self-imposed. She isn't open and honest with her mother (whom she claims to be close with) and doesn't bother to get to know, or even talk with, her father, who seems to be a nice enough guy. Throughout the book everyone at Bella's new high school is open to liking her; they invite her on group trips, sit with her at lunch, and half the boys at school want to date her. When faced with this much acceptance, Bella's refusal to form genuine bonds with anyone human makes her come across as a self-centered and elitist bitch, rather than an identifiable outcast.

But are they really Mary Sues?

Wikipedia defines a "Mary Sue" as a fictional character, particularly characterized by overly idealized and hackneyed mannerisms, lacking noteworthy flaws, and primarily functioning as wish-fulfillment fantasies for their authors or readers.

Although I can't speak for the rest of the series, in Twilight, the vampires of the Cullen clan are pretty Mary Sue-ish. They are the ultimate predators: extremely strong, fast, attractive to their prey, and dangerous all-around. They have no real weaknesses, unless you count their vegetarian consciences, and even when baddie vampires come to town, the Cullen clan assures Bella that they are so many and so powerful that they aren't in any real danger. She is, but they aren't.

This god-like invincibility, while convenient, can cause some real story problems. As humans, we are so naturally flawed that "perfect" tends to be a real turn-off, which is why "Mary Sues" are criticized rather than lauded by readers. When characters lack vulnerabilities, the stakes can only be raised so high, and the story can only be so interesting. The only helpless protagonist in Twilight is Bella, and it's only her own idiocy that gets her into danger, away from her vampire protectors.

An exchange from page 374, perhaps confirming that the vamps are indeed a bit Mary Sueish:

"I am a little disappointed," I teased.
"Why?" (Edward) asked, puzzled.
"Well, it would be nice if I could find just one thing you didn't do better than everyone else on the planet."

My big unanswered Twilight-verse question is this, if the vampires are so goddamn invincible, why haven't they taken over the world? From what I can tell, the vampires have no vulnerabilities and no real enemies aside from their own kind and a (presumably small?) pack of werewolf natives located in the Pacific Northwest. It's difficult for vampires to turn humans, but not impossible, which is how they can increase their own numbers. So why are the inherently evil vampires forced into roaming the Earth as nomadic scavengers rather than running amok, ala the Buffyverse vampires in the disturbingly creepy third season episode The Wish? It's not like any of us could stop them.

Mary Bella Swan?

I haven't read all of the books so I can't conduct an official Mary Sue Litmus Test on Bella Swan's character, but according to other readers, Bella scores an off-the-charts 81 points with Edward Cullen surpassing even her impressive score with a hard-to-believe 98 points.

As previously summed up, Bella Swan's character, right down to the first-person narrative, is most definitely a stand in for the writer/reader. The uber hot vampire and every mortal and immortal character that crosses paths with Bella is positively smitten, and she doesn't have to work at it, she just has to exist. Bella has no real flaws aside from extreme clumsiness, but this trait, along with an uncanny ability to put herself in danger, is endearing and only makes her more attractive to the possesive males in her life.

Bella is wish-fulfillment incarnate, but I just didn't particularly care for her character at all.

Bella + Edward = XOXOXO?

I have read an absolute torrent of articles/blogs/rants on the Bella/Edward relationship as an unhealthy model for the impressionable young women (and their mothers) who are reading the Twilight series. This article by Sarah Seltzer at the Huffington Post sums up many of these concerns.

While there are a few worrisome character exchanges in Twilight, the bulk of the disturbing, abusive boyfriend/passive girlfriend interactions take place in the later books. In Twilight, Edward stalks Bella by watching her while she sleeps (ew!), and often treats her like a child, patriarchically commanding her while she meekly, and without question, obeys.

The bad vibes that I got mostly came from Meyer's descriptors that accompanied Bella-Edward dialogues and directly influence how we readers interpret the text. The excerpts below took place between pages 164 and 166. These exchanges are shortly after Edward saved Bella from a gang of would-be attackers, so tensions are high ... of course, abusive boyfriends always have excuses for their violence too.

"What's wrong?" My voice came out in a whisper.
"Sometimes I have a problem with my temper, Bella." He was whispering, too, and as he stared out the window, his eyes narrowed into slits.

"What are you doing?" I asked.
"I'm taking you to dinner." He smiled slightly, but his eyes were hard. He stepped out of the car and slammed the door. I fumbled with my seat belt, and then hurried to get out of the car as well. He was waiting for me on the sidewalk.
He spoke before I could. "Go stop Jessica and Angela before I have to track them down, too. I don't think I could restrain myself if I ran into your other friends again."
I shivered at the threat in his voice.

"That's fine - I'm not hungry." I shrugged.
"I think you should eat something." Edward's voice was low, but full of authority.

"Honestly, I'm not hungry," I insisted, looking up to scrutinize his face. His expression was unreadable.
"Humor me."
He walked to the door of the restaurant and held it open with an obstinate expression. Obviously, there would be no further discussion. I walked past him into the restaurant with a resigned sigh.

Of course, patriarchy aside, the real issue I have with the Bella/Edward relationship is that it just didn't do anything for me. I find absolutely nothing appealing about a man who is so gorgeous I can hardly stand to look at him, who commands and expects that I will obey, who constantly questions my choices and my ability to function on a daily basis, who has a temper he can barely control, and who reminds me frequently that he could kill me, easily and efficiently, if he ever lost complete control of himself.

Honestly, it's too much baggage.

I've been wooed by forbidden vampire romances before, and Bella and Edward don't have anything on Buffy and Angel. For starters, Buffy and Angel like each other for more than just superficial reasons. The Bella/Edward relationship is completely founded on Edward being super hot and Bella smelling good ... there's just nothing deeper there. Angel may (also) be super hot, super strong, and super immortal, but Buffy is his equal, not just his damsel in distress. Their relationship is a balanced partnership, with each of them able to bring something to the table - strength, skills, and intelligence. When Angel's humanity slips, Buffy is not helpless putty in his hands because she has the ability and willpower to fight back.

The passage below is from my review of the Twilight movie:

While I thought Kristen Stewart did a fine job as Bella, Robert Pattinson, as Edward, was a disappointment. Pattinson's performance was very one-note; he could make broody faces, but he did little else. I wasn't convinced of his affection for Bella. Obsession, sure, but there was no real romance in his performance or his character's actions.

Thanks in large part to Stewart's appropriately understated performance (up until the end when she really started to get whiny), the romance scenes were tolerable. Edward stared, Bella sighed wistfully, and that was that. I didn't buy that the two were destined for each other and I didn't buy that their "love" was anything more than a trumped-up, melodramatic high school infatuation, just one fantastical step away from disturbing, abusive, and controlling.

When Buffy and Angel learn the hard way that their relationship is toxic (and doomed), as much as it breaks their hearts, they stay away from each other. Bella and Edward, self-absorbed and living-in-the-now, just don't have the maturity and self-respect to make that choice. And thus, their love story will always fall short.

What lessons can be learned?

As a wannabe YA fantasy writer, I have come out of this reading with a handful of lessons that can be applied to future writings, bulletpointed for convenience.

• Watch your descriptive word usage. If your first-person narrator is an average, contemporary character, try to avoid adjectives that normally appear in cheesy romance novels and SAT word lists ... from 50 years ago.

• It's okay if your protagonist is an outcast, but if she's also a Mary Sue and a bitch, chances are your readers won't like her very much.

• Personalities, interests, and character flaws are good. As are romances with a foundation that goes deeper than the physical.
  

• Teenage girls will eat up forbidden romances, no matter how cheesy. There's a reason why everybody's heard of Shakespeare's Romeo and Juliet and not necessarily Timon of Athens.

• By the time your book is finished, the vampire genre will be old news, thanks to the current overload of Twilight, The Southern Vampire Mysteries/True Blood, and the dozens of other series leaching off the Twilight phenomenon. Be the next big thing.

Wrapping It Up

I'll end this review with a confession. Even though Twilight wasn't really my thing, it's hard not to think/blog/write/make music videos about it due to its very vibrant and obsessive presence in popular culture. Twilight is everywhere, partially filling the void left by Harry Potter, and also breaking into a new generation of non-readers who are, at least, reading. Ultimately, I'd love to find a community of my contemporaries with whom I can discuss my real literature and film passions, but in the meantime, I'll settle.

2009 Booklist

*Drumroll, please*

Announcing Valderi Valdera's 2009 booklist (Barnes and Noble, here I come)! And yes, half of these are carry-overs from Booklist Aught 8. I read just over 40 books last year, but I cheated a bit and six of them were re-reads of books not on the list. Will have to try a little harder to make it up to the big 6-0!

First up this year is Stephenie Meyer's Twilight. And yes, you can expect I'll be writing another blog entry shortly as a follow up to my film review. I'm about 30 pages in and it's not nearly as painful as Christopher Paolini's Eragon, so there is hope yet.

2009 Booklist

1. 13 Clocks, James Thurber
2. The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay, Michael Chabon
3. Blindness, Jose Saramago
4. Bonfire of the Vanities, Tom Wolfe
5. The Book Thief, Markus Zusak
6. The Boy in the Striped Pyjamas, John Boyne
7. Catch-22, Joseph Heller
8. Chitty Chitty Bang Bang, Ian Fleming
9. The City of Ember, Jeanne Duprau
10. Close Range, Annie Proulx
11. Confessions of a Shopaholic, Sophie Kinsella
12. Downtown Owl, Chuck Klosterman
13. In Defense of Food, Michael Pollen
14. Eat, Pray, Love, Elizabeth Gilbert
15. Emma, Jane Austen
16. Fight Club, Chuck Palahniuk
17. The Five People You Meet in Heaven, Mitch Albom
18. Freakonomics, Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner
19. Ghost Girl, Tonya Hurley
20. The Giver, Lois Lowery
21. A Great and Terrible Beauty, Libba Bray
22. The Handmaid’s Tale, Margaret Atwood
23. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, J K Rowling
24. High Fidelity, Nick Hornby
25. I Am America (And So Can You!), Stephen Colbert
26. Interpreter of Maladies, Jhumpa Lahiri
27. Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, Susanna Clarke
28. The Joy Luck Club, Amy Tan
29. The Kite Runner, Khaled Hosseini
30. Lolita, Vladimir Nabokov
31. Madeline is Sleeping, Sarah Shun-lien Bynum
32. Minority Report and Other Stories, Philip K Dick
33. Mirror, Mirror, Gregory Maguire
34. My Name is Asher Lev, Chaim Potok
35. Neuromancer, William Gibson
36. The Omnivore’s Dilemma, Michael Pollen
37. On Writing, Stephen King
38. Paradise Lost, John Milton
39. Pastoralia, George Saunders
40. Possession, A. S. Byatt
41. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
42. Rebel Angels, Libba Bray
43. Rebel Without a Crew, Robert Rodriguez
44. Remember Me, Christopher Pike
45. Seven Basic Plots, Christopher Booker
46. Shop Girl, Steve Martin
47. The Tales of Beadle the Bard, JK Rowling
48. The Tale of Despereaux, Kate Dicamillo
49. Tangled Webs, Anne Bishop
50. The Third Witch, Rebecca Reisert
51. The Thirteenth Tale, Diane Setterfield
52. The Time Traveler’s Wife, Audrey Niffeneger
53. A Thousand Splendid Suns, Khaled Hosseini
54. The True Confessions of Charlotte Doyle, Avi
55. Twilight, Stephenie Meyer
56. The Virgin Suicides, Jeffery Eugenides
57. Watchmen, Alan Moore and Dave Gibbons
58. Water for Elephants, Sara Gruen
59. Watership Down, Richard Adams
60. Wicked: The Grimmerie, David Cote

Ode to Anne Bishop

Anne Bishop is one of my favorite fantasy writers, but when compared with fantasy's top names - J.K. Rowling, George R.R. Martin, Mercedes Lackey, and of course, King Tolkein - she is an unknown. And thus deserving of an ode (sans the stanzas, lyricism, and poetic structure)!

And So it begins ...

In 2001, I read Anne Bishop's romantic fantasy series known collectively as The Black Jewels Trilogy (Daughter of the Blood, Heir to the Throne, Queen of the Darkness) for the first time. In the seven years since, I've read the books at least half-a-dozen times and have lent or recommended them to twice as many friends - leaving my personal paperback copies in tatters (but at least I got 'em back)!

Simply put, the trilogy is wonderful. Bishop has created one of the most fascinating dark fantasy worlds I have ever read. In the world's three realms (the living Terreille, the dead Hell, and the shadowy Kaeleer), there are those who are the gifted Blood (read: magical) and those who are not. The Blood races must adhere to a strict hierarchy of power, determined by their social caste (Warlord, Witch, Priestess, Queen, etc) and the strength of the jewels they wear - the darker the jewels, the more powerful the wearer. To further complicate matters, the entire trilogy revolves around the corruption of this hierarchy (read: nothing is as it should be) and the determination of one vulnerable, but extraordinarily powerful young woman to save the realms by putting everything back in order.

Even attempting to summarize the world's many nuances is enough to make your head spin, but Bishop has put so much thought into the details, that the balance of power, realms, and races unfolds beautifully within the series and its companion novels (including The Invisible Ring and Dreams Made Flesh).

Bishop's writing is not without its flaws. She has the tendency to overuse her own brand of character archetypes - overly headstrong and fiercely volatile women, and men who are either too quick to anger or too easy to pushover. The characters often laugh raucously over jokes or missteps that the reader won't always find quite so funny.

Fortunately Bishop's strengths and creativity far outweigh a couple of bad jokes. In addition to her expressive and highly visual prose, she is particularly adept at writing characters that you can really connect with. Her trilogy's heroine, Janelle, is particularly lovable as she matures from an eccentric, love-starved child to a powerful, compelling woman who must struggle to retain her natural goodness when forced to make the kinds of world-changing decisions that could shatter anyone's humanity. Bishop also excels at the romance, and the trilogy is full of love stories of all shapes, with the central story epic enough to satisfy all romantics (and their boyfriends).

The books aren't for everyone, as there's enough sex and sexuality to categorize the trilogy as erotic fantasy (and more than enough to make a 10th grader blush).

Would Also Recommend ...

For readers who love the Black Jewels Trilogy, I would also recommend aforementioned companion books set in the the same world, as well as another Anne Bishop trilogy known collectively as the Tir Alainn Trilogy (Pillars of the World, Shadows and Light, The House of Gaian). This trilogy is more classically pagan in style, with witches whose powers are based in natural elements (fire, air, water, earth), and with themes of women persecution, suppression, and empowerment.

I am reluctant, however, to recommend Bishop's recent duology Sebastian and Belladonna. In this Ephemera series, the author tries to create yet another fascinating new world that she ultimately spends most of her time trying to set up and explain the way-it-all-works rather than developing her characters and plot beyond two-dimensional archetypes. Readers who are familiar with Bishop's style and who go in with high expectations will be particularly disappointed.

I'm looking forward to next year's The Shadow Queen, and hope to introduce more readers to Anne Bishop's worlds, in the meantime.

Anne Bishop's Official Website

2008 Booklist

I love books in every way that it is possible to love books (legally, that is). I love wandering aimlessly in Barnes and Noble, drawn from spine to spine, analyzing titles and covers and back blurbs and inside jackets. I love buying books and carrying them around in my oversized purse - anywhere from one to three at a time. I love sitting (standing is more of a challenge) on the subway reading on the way to and from work, squeezed between two strangers, trying to keep my elbows tight against my sides as I flip the pages. And when I don't have books of my own, I love casually reading over the shoulder of the stranger closest to me, delighting when I discover that theirs is a book I have already read or when I eavesdrop on a particularly juicy passage.

So I find it surprising now, after having compiled my 2008 Booklist, to discover that I have never done this before. Why, if I love reading so much, have I never determined ahead of time what I will be reading next - before?

I believe the reason is that reading has always been a fluid experience for me. Although I try to read only one book at a time (more focus, fewer entangled subplots), I never really know what will strike my fancy next, after the last page has been turned. There are certain genres that I browse the most frequently - fantasy, teen fiction, novels recently adapted to film - but I never really know if I will follow an epic fantasy with a current New York Times Bestseller or wash it down with a nineteenth century classic. My shelves are regularly filled with 30-45 books I haven't read, but as I skim the covers, my fingers itching for inspiration, I'm just as likely to pick up one of those as re-read Harry Potter for the twelfth time and buy half a dozen new books next week.

Despite the problems inherent in making a list of books that are supposed to satisfy me for the next 52 weeks, I've gone ahead and made a list of 50 as a start - about half of which I already own and the rest being titles that have recently struck my fancy.

*Bolded means I actually got through them in '08!

1. All Things Alice, Linda Sunshine
2. All Things Oz, Linda Sunshine
3. The Amber Spyglass, Phillip Pullman
4. Atonement, Ian Mcewan
5. The Bell Jar, Sylvia Plath
6. Belladonna, Anne Bishop
7. The Black Cauldron, Lloyd Alexander
8. The Book Thief, Markus Zusak
9. A Confederacy of Dunces, John Kennedy Toole
10. Emma, Jane Austen
11. The Five People You Meet in Heaven, Mitch Albom
12. Freakonomics, Steven Levitt and Stephen Dubner
13. Gathering Blue, Lois Lowery
14. A Great and Terrible Beauty, Libba Bray
15. Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows, J K Rowling
16. The Jane Austen Book Club, Karen Joy Fowler
17. Jonathan Strange and Mr. Norrell, Susanna Clarke
18. The Joy Luck Club, Amy Tan
19. I Am America (And So Can You!), Stephen Colbert
20. I Am Legend, Richard Matheson
21. The Kite Runner, Khaled Hosseini
22. Lies My Teacher Told Me, James Loewen
23. Lucky, Alice Sebold
24. Madeline is Sleeping, Sarah Shun-lien Bynum
25. Minority Report and Other Stories, Philip K Dick
26. Mirror, Mirror, Gregory Maguire
27. Naked Pictures of Famous People, Jon Stewart
28. The Namesake, Jhumpa Lahiri
29. The Nanny Diaries, Emma McLaughlin and Nicola Kraus
30. The Nimrod Flipout, Etgar Keret
31. No Plot? No Problem, Chris Baty
32. The Perks of Being a Wallflower, Stephen Chbosky
33. Pride and Prejudice, Jane Austen
34. Rebel Angels, Libba Bray
35. Redwall, Brian Jacques
36. Running With Scissors, Augusten Burroughs
37. Sebastian, Anne Bishop
38. Seven Basic Plots, Christopher Booker
39. She’s Come Undone, Wally Lamb
40. The Shining, Stephen King
41. The Subtle Knife, Phillip Pullman
42. Tangled Webs, Anne Bishop
43. The Third Witch, Rebecca Reisert
44. The Thirteenth Tale, Diane Setterfield
45. Water for Elephants, Sara Gruen
46. Why Buffy Matters, Rhonda Wilcox
47. Wicked: The Grimmerie, David Cote
48. The Will of the Empress, Tamora Pierce
49. The Woman in White, Wilkie Collins
50. Women and Children First, Francine Prose

I wanted to keep the list at 50, but of course I've already discovered omissions I had intended to include (Paradise Lost, Beowulf - preferably illustrated copies), and what about all of the deliciously wonderful books that aren't in print yet? Woe is me! This list may need to be a fluid one after all.